Headspace: Confessions of a Yogi 2

As per the request from the Twitter universe, I am starting a Confessions of a Yogi series.

The first time I wrote about this was after a weekend yoga retreat that inspired thoughts on silence, mindfulness and stepping back to go forward. After sharing the post on twitter, I realised how many people are interested in slowing down and embracing silence. It’s being appreciated more and more every day and I feel a revolution coming on! For so long society has had us believing that it’s good to be busy, and to be successful you need to be on-the-go all the time.

This is a lie.

The key to success is not being busy all the time. It’s not being productive every second of the day. Not in the way that we think we should be productive. 

Productivity, according to the Oxford English Dictionary is: “the effectiveness of productive effort, especially in industry, as measured in terms of the rate of output per unit of input”.

We misinterpret that to mean, do as much as you can all day long to produce more. The fatal flaw here is, doing more doesn’t necessarily produce more.

This is the purpose of the confessions of a yogi series, to help people slow down and clear their minds. To remind people that doing less can produce more. It may be from doing yoga, or it may be something else completely. As long as the output is success and happiness.

The big question is, how do we make the first move? How do we suddenly shift from a frantic lifestyle to a calm and serene one. I feel your pain. It feels impossible. If people are always placing demands on you at work, how can you possibly slow down? If chores need to be completed at home, how can you rest and clear your mind?

Let me tell you one thing, anything is possible. It takes determination and commitment to put new habits in place. Our brain chemistry allows us to unlearn habits and learn new ones. There is bundles of research on neurplasticity that explains how our dendrites can form new connections through repetition. So there’s no excuse. Our neurochemistry permits change, all we need to do is feed our brains with the right nutrients repetitively!

The key thing I would say is that you need to get your head in the game. Like with any sport, hobby or task. You need mentally commit to achieving it. Think about it, research it, learn more about it. Once your mind is flowing with information on a topic you will start to attract things related to it. You will attract people interested in the topic, events that touch on the topic, resources that help you with the topic.

After my retreat I had mindfulness on the brain. A few weeks later I ended up being at a talk advertised by Stylist magazine called #stylistlifelessons. There were 3 brilliant talks by 3 very different but equally inspiring women. My head was still very much focused on the quest for inner peace and mindfulness. All of a sudden, everything I heard from the 3 different speakers made me think of something in relation to my quest. They taught me lessons on how to pursue it and they got my head further into the game.

The life lesson from the first speaker Laura Bates, was around taking the first step. She talked about how she started writing a blog for herself and didn’t expect anything out of it. All of a sudden she heard from people from all over the world. One thing led to another, and then another, and then another… suddenly she was an author of a brilliant book, speaking and inspiring others to pursue their passions. All of a sudden, she was speaking at the UN about her everyday sexism project. Anything is possible if you take the first step and put yourself out there.

Just like her, making this shift in your life from manic to calm is all about taking the first step. Make the little changes first. Start introducing quiet time into your day. Go for lunch on your own rather than with others or rather than eating at your desk! Wake up half an hour earlier than everyone else in your house.  Don’t book up all of your free time in advance.  Appreciate the silence, take the first step. Trust me, it will only grow for there.

The second talk was by Francessca Martinez. Diagnosed with cerebral palsy from a young age, Francessca assured us not to ever worry about being ‘normal.’ Nobody knows what normal is anymore. There’s no such thing as normal. Normal now seems to be rushing around, not taking a moment to appreciate surroundings. Doing everything on a tight schedule and squeezing as much out of yourself as possible. In the words of Francessca, “what the f#%* is normal anyway?” I say, ignore what everyone else is doing. A wise person is one who takes the road less travelled. Who has the courage to go against social norms and create their own norm. Yes people might think you’re strange for wanting time alone, time for reflection or time for introspection. The weirder they think you are the better! You’re much closer to success if you embrace your weirdness and follow a new path that has been created just for you.

As Einstein once said “The one who follows the crowd will usually get no further than the crowd. The one who walks alone, is likely to find himself in places no one has ever been.”

The third speaker was the one and only Arianna Huffington, founder of the Huffington post. A couple of things stuck with me after Arianna’s talk. Arianna felt very strongly about burnout and how we need new role models. Burning ourselves out is no longer the path to success. Rest, rejuvenation and sleep is the way! Yep you read that correctly. The more relaxed and well rested we are, the better we will perform. The more creative we allow ourselves to be. Arianna said herself that she would have loved to meet her friends for dinner in Soho after the talk but instead she was going to take a bath and get her full quota of sleep. Sometimes we need to do that. Sometimes we need to prioritise it. This for me is probably the hardest one. Getting used to saying no to plans. I enjoy so many things but I’m starting to think I can’t do them all.  I can’t be busy all the time. If I spend all of my time exploring externally I will never have the mental capacity to explore internally.

This was a very quick insight into how much you can gain from having your head in the right place. By focussing on a topic of interest you will start to notice it all around you.

My point for today is simple, if you really want a calmer life it only takes a few simple adjustments. The rest will follow…